Mommy Guilt

I just can not believe all the horrid things that people "forget" to tell you about motherhood when your pregnant. For example, everyone knows how hard and painful labor is but does anyone tell you what a bitch healing and recovery is? NO! Or how about like I said before, people tell you how hard and painful breastfeeding is but do they tell you that your kid can use you like a pacifier? NO! Well, one major thing they also do not tell you about is a little thing called mommy guilt.

Ugh, it's like a black ooze that over takes your soul when you feel like you are not doing what's best for your baby, or incapable of doing what's best for your baby. You tend to see this a lot with working moms, who are financially obligated to return to work to provide the best "financially" for their children but tend to feel guilty because they lack time with their babies and they miss a lot of those firsts. However, that's not to say that SAHM (stay at home moms) do not feel the dreaded darkness of mommy guilt as well. It can be triggered by the simplest thing, like not realizing your child has a poopy diaper and he/she has been sitting in it for awhile and BAM your blaming yourself and feeling guilty. While all along your child is still just smiling and laughing away. So why the guilt?

Sadly, I think a lot of it comes from society. There is so much pressure as to how raise your child that if your not following societal rules you find yourself guilty and ashamed. Every where you go it's a constant nagging from every one.

Examples:

"How old is your baby?" (Insert age here.) "Is he/she sleeping through the night?" (Insert yes/no here.) "Insert judgment statement or advice here."

"How old is your baby?" (Insert age here.) "Is he/she eating solids yet?" (Insert yes/no here.) "Insert judgment statement or advice here."

"How old is your baby?" (Insert age here.) "Is he/she rolling, crawling, walking, talking, etc yet?" (Insert yes/no here.) "Insert judgment statement or advice here."

After constant conversations with strangers (and a lot of times family as well) modeled after these examples, it beats a mom down. What am I doing wrong that is making my child (insert so called societal problem here) and what can I do to fix it?  Insert mommy guilt here.

But you know what? What if it does not need to be fixed? What if your child is perfect the way he/she is and what if you are doing exactly what you should be doing the entire time? Follow your heart, trust your instincts and stand strong and the mommy guilt will fade and you will find yourself a much happier mom.