Our society has this huge hang up on babies learning to self soothe. I don't understand it. I find lots of problems with this expectation of self soothing.
1. Their just babies. If they had the cognitive ability to self soothe they would have the cognitive ability to use logic and other complex matters of the brain. They only know the basic needs of survival: eat, sleep and touch/warmth.
2. They have just experienced a extremely traumatizing event...birth. They are pulled from a world completely set up for them. Perfect temperature, always being cradled and rocked, soothing sounds and most of all always nourished. You then take them and put them in a world set up for you. "Your not hungry yet, it hasn't been three hours." "You can't sleep with me, you need to sleep in your cold room alone." "I can't hold you, you will be spoiled." "So what if you cry, your fed and changed and just woke up from nap and I have dishes to do." All of a sudden these babies went from everything being satisfied to now they have to scream and cry to get satisfaction and you ignore their screams and cries in order to get them to self soothe.
3. Do you self soothe? Last time I checked I don't. When I am upset and crying I want a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen to me. Why should I expect any less of my child?
Treat your child like a little person, a mini you. Put yourself in their shoes and see how you would feel being treated that way. Babies are not little robots to be programmed or dogs to be trained. They are humans to be taught, nurtured, and loved.
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